Hi guys. I was going to make a video for todays post but sadly good old insecurities have got in the way. Even so, today is September 10th, Suicide Prevention Day. Id like to talk about the impact of suicides on lives such as my own, and the importance of this day.
As I said in a previous post, suicide affects so many more lives than you expect. With an estimated 800,000 deaths a year equal to one death every 40 seconds, we wonder why this totally preventable tragedy is happening. This is why Suicide Prevention Week, and Day is so important. People are aware of suicide as a problem, but not the extent. Often when they hear a story that hits close to home they realise how much of an issue it actually is. This was definitely the case with me. At present, nearly every one of my friends has either thought of suicide or has scars on their bodies. Even I didnt realise how bad of a problem this was until recently. Id like to share my own story in the hopes it will resonate with someone reading.
I have struggled with mental health all my life, leading to a very early problem with self harm. Id love to say these thoughts go away but even when you feel recovered sadly thats not the case. The last time I thought about hurting myself was last night. The last time I smoked was yesterday. Suicidal thoughts are different to these impulses however. Im sad to say Ive also been there. I was once told I dont have any visible tellings of my suicide attempts but funnily enough thats not the case. I wear glasses and have hearing aids from where Ii hit my head. These are not expected disabilities or scars from suicide attempts but I have stuff people wouldnt expect. I have not thought about an attempt in a long time, but Ill always have these permanent reminders of how bad it was.
Recently I broke up with my long term boyfriend, something that completely shattered my heart. I was, and still am left feeling lost, heartbroken, like Ive lost the future I had planned. In the past I wouldve wrote off my whole life because of this. My planned future was gone so I should be too. But now I realise that isnt true. Just because this path for my future is gone, doesnt mean I cant just move on to a different path.
I have never thought of things like this before, but for once I have a positive outlook in the face of heartbreak. And its all down to my friends. My friends saved me, more than theyll ever realise. By texting me all night, by hanging out in parks getting drunk and laughing with me, by going walking and talking. I have an amazing support system, and Ill be forever grateful.
If anyone reading right now is experiencing suicidal thoughts, please know that it does get better. I know when I was there that phrase meant nothing to me but Im living proof that life goes on and you can be happy and I hope my story shows you that. If you dont believe me look at Katie. She went from a suicide attempt to living in a beautiful house with the love of her life. Things do get better, you just have to stick around to see it. Please stick around. You are worth it I promise.
Check out Pieta House here – https://www.pieta.ie/
Check out our resource page here – https://kmwblogs.com/2020/08/10/resources-and-support/
Reach out to your friends and family today. Ask them how theyre doing and really listen. Tell them you love them and how much they mean to you. Love is the most important thing in the world.
Stay safe guys,
Lots of love,